re_alignment | [Voice] PSA and a Plan

Entry tags:

✘ dead space | vandal

[Voice] PSA and a Plan

Hey uh guys? Those "explosives" that Prism asshole was talking about?

All a fake. I opened Drift up and took a look and it turned out he was bluffing. I hope that's worth a little peace of mind or... whatever. From what I could see, it's just like a tag. Nothing intrusive. I couldn't remove it, but it's not dangerous.

On that note:

Teddie and I were kind of talking about having a party of sorts. Like kind of a karaoke-movie-drink-yourself-dumb extravaganza. I was thinking maybe when Casa De Vandal is finished I could host it there? I still have to fix everything, but I have most of the equipment.

Thoughts? Ideas? Can I get a 'Hell yeah'?

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Did you, uh, did you have to mention you'd, uh, done that?

[Because he's been trying really hard to keep that on the DL, Vandal. Because Wing.]

Vandal. Has. Teddie. Asked you. About 'scoring'?

[And he is SO trying not to think about the math of Teddie + Vandal = ???]

[As usual, hats off for you.]

Oh uh. Sorry, Drift. Is this a modesty thing?

... Oh haha. Yeah we had a talk about that. Why, you thinkin' about "scoring" huh?

[GRIN.]

It's...not really about modesty. Just, you know, sort of embarrassing. The whole 'not a bomb' thing.

[Also if Wing hears Drift had volunteered to be blown up, yeah. That would be bad.]

Teddie wants to score with a pretty human female.

[You...just happen to be a pretty human female. Does he need to draw you a picture?]

Are you....into bears? [HE IS NOT GOING TO JUDGE YOU IF YOU SAY YES.]

[He is also going to ninja his way out of answering that last bit. Because the answer is yes.]

Oh... uh. Sorry. But people kind of need to know?

[PAUSE.]

What the- NO! Seriously?! Drift!

[He sighs.] You're right. I should be glad the news is making others relieved.

I just. Well it's none of my business. And Teddie's...nice?

[And this is not him being nobly jealous. At all. ]

Was there anything I could do to make it up to y-

DRIFT SERIOUSLY! He's a fucking- BEAR! I'm not going to fuck a bear!

But he's from Earth. Like you.

[SO, you know, homesick or something?]

....just trying to be, you know, open minded. [Sheesh.]

Drift. He's a bear. That's. SO wrong on so many levels. And I'm not from Earth! I've never even been to a planet before this one. I was born on a ship.

That aside, he's a bear. And even if he wasn't he's not my type. And I've talked to him all of once.

I... oh, Drift. You're so fucking silly sometimes I can't handle it.

[Face in hands half-laughing-half-shaking-her-head.]

....

[Okay. Got it. Teddie's a bear. The bear. The bear obsessed with scoring.]

So. What is your type? Other than, uh, not-bear.

[Hey, you brought it up!]

I'm just....trying.

Haha... my type? I don't know. I don't really. Uh. Date much? I mean, I was with maybe like. Two people in high school and one in college. The first guy doesn't really count because we dated all of maybe a week. Jeremy I was with for a year, and Carol I dated all through college until we drifted apart.

[SHRUG.]

It's been probably six or seven years since then. They were all different. I just like people, I guess. It's hard to say if there are any patterns.

[She just realized she probably sounds like a huge loser now.]

Edited 2012-08-23 20:46 (UTC)

Oh. So. You like school people.

[He has discovered your type!]

Maybe one of the First Forged has a school or something and you can, you know, find someone.

[Clearly Drift is better than the wingbear, Vandal.]

[He's also really glad they're not talking about her, you know, poking his exposed spark chamber in public again.]

Haha- no. It was just sort of the only place I ever had to meet people?

Wh... Drift why are you trying to set me up with someone? I don't really. Want to. Do that. You know? Dating is really hard. I mean, you know, doing that. It's stressful when I try too hard to-

Ah. I'm okay on my own.

[HEADING RIGHT DOWN THIS PATHETIC PATH AND NOT LOOKING BACK.]

Oh. [Well...now he feels silly. er.]

I just, you know, Teddie and scoring.

_{Perceptor's nice.}

[Wut, he's being subliminal there.]

I just want you to be happy.

I'm-

Drift. Come on. I really appreciate you trying to help me. But I'm not-

Perceptor? Can a human even... date a robot? Anyways look, that aside. I'm just not fit for...

[Sigh.]

I'm bad at this. I'm happy just hanging out with you, Wing, Percy and Soundwave okay? I'm not good for relationships anymore.

Edited 2012-08-23 21:59 (UTC)

[He shrugs.] I don't know I thought Ratchet, you know, might know.

[Wow this is far too grim. Time to lighten the mood.]

But hey you've already poked at my spark chamber. I think that means we're...uh...something. [Okay that sort of failed. But A for Effort!]

Yyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyeah he offered to councel me in. That. Awkward.

It's like getting the sex-talk from my dad.

[PAUSE.]

Friends with medical benefits.

[Well that was HER attempt at a joke. EVERY-ONE-IN-THE-AWKWARD-TENT...]

So, wait. Why are you asking me if it's possible?

[Seriously, Vandal, what is up with that?]

[He starts laughing. Because it is funny. And awkward. And funny some more. Also Drift apparently has an awful sense of humor.]

Let's just, uh, not have a repeat at this party thing you're thinking of.

It was a rhetorical question! Hey. I didn't want to hear what Ratchet had to say about chafing okay. Would you stick around for that? I don't think so, buster.

[Laughing too but mostly because he's laughing and she's kind of screaming inside her head a little bit.]

Well as long as you stay safe I won't have to. Save it for Wing.

[WIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIINK.]

....if it was a topic I was interested in?

[Vandal, he has met Kup. He's heard some pretty TMI stories.]

I hope Ratchet at least gives you some credit for it.

[Which is him SO not promising to stay safe because he's who he is, after all. ]

Now who's the one trying to match people up?

So you're interested in how to stick it in humans? Wow, never knew you were so kinky.

[Gently sasses.]

Come on, everyone knows it. Just boff already so we can all say "I told you so".

...I didn't say that!!

Besides, he was talking to you about it.

[So....there.]

You make it sound so...romantic.

Hahah- but you're so interested.

Oh. I'm sorry. You two should look deeply into each other's optics during a sunset with flowers and stuff everywhere and whisper sweet nothings?

Well. I mean.

[He means it's time to change the topic. ]

You know, it's a thing to learn. That's all. [He's all about learning after all.]

...is that how your kind does it?

Oh uhm.

[Wow stop being so cute.]

No? Well, sometimes. That's supposedly the human ideal, at least, but that's rarely how it goes. You mean like how humans have sex?

[If he's asking her this, she has the power to either tell the truth or spin some hilarious fabrication up for him. HMMM. WHAT TO DO.]

I mean, surely you've thought about it, right? Who hasn't?

[RIGHT?!?!]

Well, I mean, how you start.

[He tries for a cocky smile. ] I think I know how to handle it after that. [You buy that, right?]

[Voice] PSA and a Plan

[video]

[video]

[video]

[video]

[Voice]

[Voice]

[video]

[video]

[video] she takes her helmet off talking to him so she can facepalm?

[video] PRETTY MUCH.

[video]

[video]

[video]

[video]

[video]

[video]

[video]

[video]

[video]

[video]

[video]

[video]

[video]

[video]

[video]

[video]

[video]

[video]

[video]

[video]

[video]

[video]