controlledvariable | exsilium; ic inbox

So whenever you're done flirting with strangers on the network, I've got a few secondhand suits that need to be fixed up. I can pay you with actual money as opposed to bartering with baked goods. How's that sound?

i think we were bartering with his virginity, actually!

but money's fine, too.

Gross.

You do know how to tailor regular suits, right? I'm not going to come out of this with some latex-lined thing?

also he's not a stranger. just for the record.

and of course i know how to line regular suits, what do you take me for?

Oh, OK. That makes it totally fine, then.

And idk! I doubt you have a tailoring resume on hand. I don't know what kind of work you've done. Maybe your specialty is just superhero garb. How should I know?

and he's cute, that also makes it totally fine.

have some faith, saul. most of the clothes i wear are handmade, i can show you some if you want to see what i can do.

Talking about cute boys isn't on my to-do list for today. I'll take your word for it.

And for that, too. It's you or the elf guy, and he and I didn't hit it off so well. I've been collecting stuff that's a little on the big side so all you'll have to do is take things in, etc.

your day sounds really boring, then.

taking things in is easy, i've been working with second hand clothing since i was old enough to use a sewing machine

Actually, I have an announcement to make later. And it's not boring. So there.

Anyway, perfect. Knew I could count on you, neshomeleh. :)

bet you five marques i think it's boring.

i'm in 104, if you wanna drop the suits around whenever.

[Since she's actually living there again, instead of hiding out in assorted places.

Also thank god for the option to translate things, considering she doesn't speak Yiddish.]

did you just call me sweetheart?

Only five? I'll drop them by a little later.

And yes.

i try not to gamble too much.

so.

are you being catty about me flirting on the network 'cause you're jealous?

[STEPH..........]

[STEPH.]

Don't flatter yourself.

so that's a no, then?

i'm heartbroken.

[stop]

I'm a certified heartbreaker.

[no really he has 3 sets of divorce papers to prove it!!]

You'll get over it.

i won't believe that until i see your heartbreaking licence.

will i though?

It's in a pair of pants I left at home, sorry.

And I know I'm hard to get over, but you have to try. Go listen to some Adele. Tell your friends about how much I suck. Worst lawyer evar omg.

a convenient excuse.

you missed the part where i eat a tub of ice cream by myself while watching rom-coms.

Oops. Sorry. Rom-coms or The Notebook?

nicholas sparks can go fuck himself, to be honest

Those stories might not exist if he could, I bet.

you reckon we could con the initiative into letting us go back in time to kill nicholas sparks?

I don't need any more women to hate me. You can solo that one.

i thought we were friends

Friendships have limits.

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